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Gridlocked and Loaded
Gridlocked and Loaded is the fifth episode of season two of Evil Con Carne. Synopsis On their way to steal a ton of gold bricks from a ship, Hector Con Carne, General Skarr, Major Dr. Ghastly, and a new recruit named Tony, get stuck in a traffic jam. Plot Hector, Ghastly, and Skarr are in the Con Carne Car, all stuck in traffic. Skarr, in the driver's seat, angrily honks the horn, which does nothing. We're then introduced to Tony, a wimpy college graduate, working his first day on the job as a Henchman for Evil Con Carne. Tony needs to be reminded of their intended plan. Hector groans at this guy, not just because of his incompetence, but also because of his constant usage of outdated phrases like "Gosh, Golly Gee." and "Sock it to me." as well as his mourning over his hospitalized pet cat. Skarr and Ghastly explain Tony's uselessness to the team, describing him as yet another generic, throwaway henchman. Hector explains the evil plan, one last time for exposition. The group is driving the car, to reach the docks, where a ship is being loaded with tons of gold. They plan to steal the gold, but they're racing against the clock, as the boat's departure time is 10:00am, which makes the traffic jam all the more inconvenient. With the current time being 7:15am, Hector gets anxious and impatient. He then orders Boskov to curse the traffic. Boskov then shakes his fist and roars in anger, apparently using harsh profanities in bear language, even though the only audible words were "honk honk" and "beep beep". Skarr blames Hector for their lateness, reminding him that he made them pull over for a breakfast burrito earlier. Hector justifies this, saying that he can't work on an empty, stomach. Stomach backs him up on that. Hector then places the blame on Ghastly for taking forever with putting on her make up before they even left. Ghastly says that she put on extra make up, to look pretty for a certain someone, dropping a hint for Hector, who completely misses it. Hector assumes she's talking about Tony. She denies this, and Hector then assumes it's Skarr, which she also denies. Hector doesn't know of any other people in the car she could be referencing to and gives up. He's then stricken with realization and assumes it's someone down at the docks. Angered that he's still oblivious to her affection, Ghastly throws a book at him. Hector begins wondering and asks why he's sitting in the back seat, if he's the leader. Ghastly tells him it's because she called "shotgun". Hector doesn't know the rules of shotgun and tries calling it, in the middle of the car ride. Ghastly tells him that's not how it works. Hector then calls atom bomb, and Ghastly yells at him to stop. The two argue like children and Hector then kicks the back of her seat. Ghastly darts at him for this, but Hector blames it on Tony, which actually works. Boskov claws Tony to shreds, which puts Ghastly at ease. Instantly afterwards, Hector kicks her seat again. Hector is seen manipulating Tony's foot, making him kick her seat. The three of them yell and fit, until Skarr eventually yells at them to shut up. He acts like the parent of a bunch of children, even saying the famous "turn the car around and go gome" line. After the chaos dies down, Skarr is delghted to see traffic finally clearing up. Meanwhile at the docks, a sailor sits and raves to his friend about the gold being loaded on the boat. He then makes oddly specific comments about his fear of a gang of crazy villains driving up in a car and stealing from them. Fortunately for him, none of what he mentioned happens. We cut back to the Con Carne Car, where it turns out the "traffic clearing up" thing was just a false alarm and the gang is still in the same place as they were before. Hector puts on some heavy metal music, but Ghastly turns it off and puts in a mix tape, featuring a more peaceful love song "Cinnamon Love". While the song plays, she fantasizes about running with Hector through a meadow of flowers. Hector in her fantasy, has a human body, but his face is still a talking brain. The two lay down and start kissing. Outside of her fantasy, Ghastly is lying down in her seat repeating "Hector!" and "Yes!" Still oblivious to her love, Hector assumes she's calling his name, and is annoyed with her lack of responding. Skarr complains about the sunshiney, joyful tone of the song, and things only get worse as Hector and Boskov start singing along and Tony bursts into tears, since the song reminds him of his cat. Fed up with it, Skarr ejects the mix tape and throws it out the window. Again focusing on the docks, the two sailors sit and do nothing. The talkitive one then sees the approaching villains in the distance and freaks out over the ship getting robbed. However, it turns out that it's simply a pelican, and they still have nothing to worry about. Once again, Evil Con Carne is still deep in the field of traffic. Hector bothers Ghastly about the "shotgun" game again, but she screams back, having had enough. Right after shutting about shotgun, he unleashes a stream of complaints toward Skarr, until he snaps. Skarr yells at Hector, telling him if he knows so much about driving then he can take the wheel, but then instantly backs out of it, not wanting to give up the drivers seat. Ghastly tries to calm them down, by suggesting they play a driving game. Everyone else starts listing a bunch of stupid ideas for games. Hector once again brings up a "shotgun" related game, followed by a game called "Skarr is a Doo Doo Head", which ends up being real. Skarr suggests a came called "Shut Up" and Hector then suggests "Everyone in the Car is a Big Nerd Except for Me." Ghastly calls him out on his immaturity, and Hector calls her fat. Ghastly snaps and starts shooting at him with a laser, but is a horrible shot, missing every single shot, fired at a giant bear, when she sits a few feet away. Tony brings up his cat again, and Hector fires him in anger. Tony sadly jumps out the car door and Hector wishes death on his cat. At the docks, the last of the gold is loaded on the ship and 10:00 is just around the corner. The sailor is asked about his obsession for the ship getting robbed, by Harv, after blabbing about it for the thousanth time. He says that talking about it keeps his mind off his empty life. In the Con Carne Car, Ghastly has finally shot Hector. Hector then begs the question as to why the car doesn't have the ability to transform into a giant robot. He then notices that there was a button in the car the whole time, that could have made it do just that. He presses it and they have the robot crush all the traffic in front of them, rushing to the ship, having only minutes to get there. When they arrive, the ship has already been robbed. When Hector asks a police officer, his description of the criminal, matches up perfectly with their recently relieved Henchman, Tony. Hector goes blind with rage, and completely gives up on his now failed plan. The trio of Evil Con Carne leaders then discuss what they'll do afterwards. Ghastly proposes the agreed-upon suggestion of going to a Flea Market, just before calling shotgun again, leaving Hector screaming in anger once again. Characters Major Roles *Hector Con Carne *Major Dr. Ghastly *General Skarr *Tony Minor Roles *Boskov *Stomach *Harv *Mr. Wiggledoody (Mentioned; Pictured) *Grim (As a Bobblehead) *Billy (Non-Speaking Cameo; Ending Credits Only) Trivia *The title is a pun on the phrase "Locked and Loaded". *Overall, a total of 3 hours and 45 minutes passed, thoughout the timeline of the episode. *This episode is generally what's known as a "Bottle Episode", which means the almost the entire episode, takes place in a condensed setting, with only a few select characters. In this case, the setting of the majority of the episode was a car, and the only major characters were Hector, Ghastly, Skarr, and Tony. **This episode's concept is reminiscent of the TV show, Seinfeld, which was known for it's recurring theme of having entire episodes dedicated to nothing happening. Episode conflicts would simply be everyday inconveniences, (i.e. getting stuck in traffic), and the few major characters, would spend most of their time arguing, followed by a very anti-climactic twist ending. *The made-up car game of calling shotgun is used as a running gag in this episode, with Ghastly being able to always ride stagecoach, and Hector not understanding the rules of the game. *Hector tells Boskov to curse the traffic. Boskov then roars in rage, and the words "honk honk" and "beep beep" are clearly vocalized by him, making this one of the few episodes, where Boskov technically talks. *Jess Harnell guest voice acts as both the singer of "Cinnamon Love" and the cop at the end of the episode. *Tony would make future background appearances, despite being fired at the end of this episode. *Two references to The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy are in this episode. General Skarr has a bobblehead of The Grim Reaper on the dashboard of the car. Later, Billy appeared in the ending credits. **Similarly, this episode was featured on the two Billy and Mandy episodes, "Hill Billy" and "The Love That Dare Not Speak It's Name". Category:Episodes Category:Season 2 Category:Episodes focusing on Hector Category:Episodes focusing on General Skarr Category:Episodes focusing on Major Doctor